Hello Martha! We are 36 years old and have been together for 17 years, 10 of which we have been married. I have never had any cheeting issues in the past. My husband is a supervisor where he works and he has a four man crew. He recently lost 2 people so he had to hire someone. We live in a small community and he didn't have much to chose from. He told me he was going to hire a young girl. She just turned 19 in December. He asked if I was ok with that, I said yes. Now she has been there 2 weeks and I find myself really jealous and I don't know why? She wears hip huggers and crop tops, and thong panties sticking out like all the teens do, but it bothers me that she's dressed that way around my husband. But it is also normal for her to dress that way. She is thin and pretty. And I kow she is 17 years younger, but should I be worried? I don't know why I'm feeling this way. Is this normal?

I'm so pleased that you're asking about your own feelings, instead of trying to control your husband or his new teenage employee. I suspect the situatoin is stirring up some deep fears for you, fears about aging, about your personal value, your distant future. It could be that you also feel your husband being attracted to his employee, but to be blunt, there's not a lot you can do about that. If she went away, there would be other cute young women around your husband anyway. I suggest you write about your feelings in a journal. Start by writing, "I feel jealous and afraid because..." and then keep writing. Be as honest as you can. You'll probably find that the real issues are your own deepest fears. By addressing them, you'll relax and gain self-confidence. People, including husbands, love being around relaxed, self-confident people. Believe it or not, being your best self almost always trumps a thong when it comes to keeping someone's love.

I think if you trust your husband than there is no reason for you to be jelous. I am a 19 year old and im married to my husband who is in the army and is in Iraq. I get jelous because he hangs out with this girl but there is always friends around him and and that hang out with that girl to. so i think as long as you trust him and you love him than you should have no worrys about anything. But again i am young and have only been married a year and half